Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
Can I use LISP to write myself a girlfriend or can LISP only be used
for writing boyfriends? A shemale would be ok, too, as long as she has
big tits...
"Eliot Coweye" <············@lycos.com> writes:
> Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
>
> Can I use LISP to write myself a girlfriend or can LISP only be used
> for writing boyfriends? A shemale would be ok, too, as long as she has
> big tits...
There has been some work done in this direction before:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0090305/
It made for a mind-bogglingly bad movie, but if you're desperate
enough, I'm sure you can write yourself a mind-bogglingly bad program.
--
/|_ .-----------------------.
,' .\ / | Free Mumia Abu-Jamal! |
,--' _,' | Abolish the racist |
/ / | death penalty! |
( -. | `-----------------------'
| ) |
(`-. '--.)
`. )----'
From: Ulrich Hobelmann
Subject: Re: Can I program myself a girlfriend in LISP ???
Date:
Message-ID: <3ub66oFv5107U2@individual.net>
Thomas F. Burdick wrote:
> "Eliot Coweye" <············@lycos.com> writes:
>
>> Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
>>
>> Can I use LISP to write myself a girlfriend or can LISP only be used
>> for writing boyfriends? A shemale would be ok, too, as long as she has
>> big tits...
>
> There has been some work done in this direction before:
>
> http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0090305/
>
> It made for a mind-bogglingly bad movie, but if you're desperate
> enough, I'm sure you can write yourself a mind-bogglingly bad program.
There's also "The Stepford Wives" which probably has the women
programmed in some kind of Lisp. Not sure.
--
The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Ulrich Hobelmann <···········@web.de> writes:
> There's also "The Stepford Wives" which probably has the women
> programmed in some kind of Lisp. Not sure.
No. They used some sort of scripting language.
--
http://www.david-steuber.com/
The UnBlog: An island of conformity in a sea of quirks.
http://www.david-steuber.com/snippets/Boycott_Sony/
···@conquest.OCF.Berkeley.EDU (Thomas F. Burdick) writes:
> "Eliot Coweye" <············@lycos.com> writes:
>
>> Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
>>
>> Can I use LISP to write myself a girlfriend or can LISP only be used
>> for writing boyfriends? A shemale would be ok, too, as long as she has
>> big tits...
>
> There has been some work done in this direction before:
>
> http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0090305/
>
> It made for a mind-bogglingly bad movie, but if you're desperate
> enough, I'm sure you can write yourself a mind-bogglingly bad program.
And don't forget the body for your robotgirl: http://www.realdoll.com/
But if you're busy, having your girlfriend on the phone can be enough:
http://www.3g.co.uk/PR/August2004/8226.htm
--
__Pascal Bourguignon__ http://www.informatimago.com/
In a World without Walls and Fences,
who needs Windows and Gates?
Thomas F. Burdick wrote:
> "Eliot Coweye" <············@lycos.com> writes:
>
>
>>Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
>>
>>Can I use LISP to write myself a girlfriend or can LISP only be used
>>for writing boyfriends? A shemale would be ok, too, as long as she has
>>big tits...
>
>
> There has been some work done in this direction before:
>
> http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0090305/
>
> It made for a mind-bogglingly bad movie,..
Come on, Kelly LeBrock was brilliant.
--
Kenny
Why Lisp? http://wiki.alu.org/RtL_Highlight_Film
"I've wrestled with reality for 35 years, Doctor, and I'm happy to state
I finally won out over it."
Elwood P. Dowd, "Harvey", 1950
I'd recommend a positronic brain, but the solution to your problem is
quite simple in Lisp:
(progn
(if (right-handed)
(use right-hand)
(use left-hand)))
+ "Jack" <············@msn.com>:
| I'd recommend a positronic brain, but the solution to your problem is
| quite simple in Lisp:
|
| (progn
| (if (right-handed)
| (use right-hand)
| (use left-hand)))
What a useless use of PROGN. And you don't want these conditionals
scattered all over your code. With CLOS, you just write different
methods for right-handed and left-handed people where appropriate.
Note that there are situations where external factors take presedence
over your own handedness: If you want to keep a hand on your
non-existent girlfriend's knee while driving, which hand to use
depends on whether your car has the steering wheel on the left or on
the right. All these complexities of life call for a CLOS solution.
Girlfriends need CLOSeness. 'nuff said.
--
* Harald Hanche-Olsen <URL:http://www.math.ntnu.no/~hanche/>
- Debating gives most of us much more psychological satisfaction
than thinking does: but it deprives us of whatever chance there is
of getting closer to the truth. -- C.P. Snow
> What a useless use of PROGN. And you don't want these conditionals
> scattered all over your code. With CLOS, you just write different
> methods for right-handed and left-handed people where appropriate.
> Note that there are situations where external factors take presedence
> over your own handedness: If you want to keep a hand on your
> non-existent girlfriend's knee while driving, which hand to use
> depends on whether your car has the steering wheel on the left or on
> the right. All these complexities of life call for a CLOS solution.
> Girlfriends need CLOSeness. 'nuff said.
A sufficiently intelligent compiler would optimize away the PROGN. I
decided to use it just in case tomorrow I decide to add to the program
and perhaps even change it to a LET--I wouldn't need to bother worrying
about matching parens, indentation, etc., in the event that I wasn't in
the mood to fire up Emacs for help with the editing.
As for the conditional, the problem wasn't even big enough to worry
about it. Whereas I suppose I could have offered (play-with-yourself
(choose-hand)), which is much shorter and Lispier, the IF form was the
first thing to come to mind--I guess I'm still thinking in C.
Sure, if he's serious about the project and wants to model different
scenarios in the program, CLOS would probably be the way to go... I
wasn't going to make a career out of feeding the troll.
From: Ulrich Hobelmann
Subject: Re: Can I program myself a girlfriend in LISP ???
Date:
Message-ID: <3ub6c9Fv5107U3@individual.net>
[cut brasil.unix]
Eliot Coweye wrote:
> Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
Instead of going after the problem, you go for the surrogate?
You should program women into liking you, but I'm not too sure where
Lisp fits in that equation.
Maybe something like:
1. write really cool program in Lisp
...
5. Profit!
6. Women!
--
The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
"Eliot Coweye" <············@lycos.com> writes:
> Real women don't want me, so I have to program myself a girlfriend.
>
> Can I use LISP to write myself a girlfriend or can LISP only be used
> for writing boyfriends? A shemale would be ok, too, as long as she has
> big tits...
(defun make-girlfriend ()
"Not work safe."
(let* ((x (cons #\. nil))
(y (list (make-string 0)))
(magic (format nil "~~3%~~A~~A~~4% ~A~~3%" y))
(chromosome (list x x)))
(apply #'format nil magic chromosome)))